|
Post by eez on Dec 26, 2009 5:43:02 GMT -5
"You don't know the half of it..." Zurg sighed disdainfully, shaking his head as his minions continued to rough-house and generally make a mess of things--never mind the Hornets still eating those doughnuts!
|
|
|
Post by Blacksteel on Dec 26, 2009 5:44:56 GMT -5
"Oh?" This statement had the demon intrigued. "What do you mean by that?"
|
|
|
Post by eez on Dec 26, 2009 5:48:25 GMT -5
"Well, it's true!" The Evil Emperor admitted shamelessly, shrugging. "Every single hired hand I employ, most are scragglers or left-overs of society. Take the grubs, for example; those stinkers were found on some backwater methane-ridden, swamp planet with barely a sense of rudimentary blender skills. Now, they can assemble anything thing I throw at them in the nick of time." He explained, stepping out of the way as a pack of the insectoids ran past playfully in a good game of zap.
"It's just the saying that the broken attract the broken I suppose. Oh well...." Zurg concluded, rolling his eyes skyward before resuming his usual scowl. "I'm just a magnet for freak shows--myself included."
|
|
|
Post by Blacksteel on Dec 26, 2009 5:53:07 GMT -5
So the emperor had a soft spot after all... though Hellboy suspected that if he dared to hint at it he'd be kicked out of here faster than a child kicked a ball.
"So what next?" the demon inquired, stepping up to a table and sampling a snack. he had to admit that he was rather hungry. "I mean, well, as your new agent, what am I expected to do when I don't have missions to fulfill and stuff?"
And where am I going to stay...? he mused. He hadn't slept for two nights in a row. He could go on for a couple more without sleep, but that did not mean that he wasn't getting tired, and feeling the strain of it.
|
|
|
Post by eez on Dec 26, 2009 5:56:25 GMT -5
"Simple." Zurg called out, watching the agent meander over to pick out one of the snacks. "You're on-call until I do call you. Until then, you may do as you please; I'm not your babysitter." He snorted as he folded his arms gruffly.
"With your most generous paycheck, I would imagine that you should find a feasible place to locate yourself when you are on-call--I'd rather not have you so close to home when you could be used elsewhere at a sooner date."
Of course, this was a blatant lie as Zurg didn't want his agent, complete with that dashing suit, to suddenly assassinate him one night without warning. The percentage of it happening was slim, but there was still that percentage; and this...worried him.
|
|
|
Post by Blacksteel on Dec 26, 2009 6:05:28 GMT -5
"Oh, right..." the demon said slowly. "I get paid..." He had completely forgotten about that. Then the words 'generous paycheck' registered. "Wait, just how much are you paying me?" he asked, turning around to face Zurg again. As a BPRD agent, he really didn't actually use money since he lived there and most of his expenses were usually taken care of by the Bureau itself.
|
|
|
Post by eez on Dec 26, 2009 6:10:27 GMT -5
"Well let's find out, shall we~?"
Zurg snapped his fingers once and a tiny grub carrying a brief case came dashing out of some shadowy corner; it's little legs a blur as it darted towards its evil master with huffs and puffs.
"Hmmm, 2.4 seconds; not bad, but you've gained weight!" The Evil Emperor scolded. "Expect to see your name on the Evil Bowling roster."
There was a groan of disbelief but it was cut as Zurg snapped his fingers again and the grub pried open the case, revealing crisp green bills condensed into bricks within. Inside, there had to be several dozens of these suckers.
"These are unibucks." The Evil Emperor explained, taking a wad and easing his fingers over the top, skimming each and every one of them in a shuffle. "And if you perform as you did tonight, you can expect more where this came from. The average sum per mission is based on performance so it would be around...oh....eight-hundred thousand UB--sometimes ten times that if I think the mission is worth it."
|
|
|
Post by Blacksteel on Dec 26, 2009 6:22:48 GMT -5
Unibucks... they were probably like american dollars, maybe their worth being a bit below or over a dollar, since they looked like them too. At least the form of currency hadn't changed all that much throughout the course of the centuries.
He had just served himself some punch and had only managed to take a sip, barely managing to register its sour, tangy taste before spitting it back out, but not because of the flavour, but because of the sum of money he just heard.
"Eight hundred thousand!?" he spluttered. And sometimes ten times that!? The BPRD never got funded all that much, and most expenses went to traveling to other countries and stocking up on supernatural defenses and the like. He had never seen so much cold hard cash in one place in his life!
He took a wad of bills and flicked through them, amazed. "Wow... uh, I don't know what to say..."
|
|
|
Post by eez on Dec 26, 2009 6:30:12 GMT -5
The agent's reaction was flattering, to say the least, and the Evil Emperor gave out a polite chuckle as he eyed the flabbergasted red man.
"Oh don't be so silly! Eight hundred thousand is barely the tip of the acidic iceberg!" Zurg clarified. "In fact, the grubs down in Finances--ugh, those leeches--calculated that eight hundred thousand turns out to be exactly .000000001 of my evil budget so.....I don't know, you do the math! It was never my favourite subject; along with grammar..."
After that little blurb, the Evil Emperor cleared his throat and regained composure.
"Regardless of how deep the pool can be with all my monetary gain over the decades, I don't cherish it like other mongers do--it's just money, after all." He shrugged again casually. "So my decision stands, this brief case is yours to start out with."
Zurg snapped his fingers for the third and last time, the grub waddling over and setting the case down before scampering off to join its frosting-covered brethren.
"I believe the amount in there is settled at an even 1.5 million UB, as that has to cover the cost of living and whatnot for your first run, so spend it wisely. It could be several months before I call you again; I suggest you venture out and soak up all the galaxy has to offer and learn from it. Oh and take that spiffy ship of yours with you--I do believe Erevos will be a bit curious."
As Zurg said this, there was a brief gleam in his eyes but he otherwise didn't elaborate and he left it there, mired in mystery as to what exactly he truly meant.
|
|
|
Post by Blacksteel on Dec 27, 2009 2:44:46 GMT -5
Holy smokes, this guy was insanely rich. Everyone at the BPRD kept counting every dime they spent but Zurg treated the amount as if it was a mere speck in his income--which it probably was, but Hellboy's strong suit had never been math.
"Well, it's still more money than I've ever had in my entire lifetime," he said in a voice of awe, taking the suitcase. He wouldn't call himself a greedy individual who only craved money and the like, but he was feeling more than a bit overwhelmed at the fact that he had been paid so much just to crash a wedding. "Uh... thanks." Exploring this new galaxy was, in effect, the only thing Hellboy could do now. Maybe Erevos could suggest a few things... he seemed like a nice enough fellow, for a spaceship.
He looked up at Zurg, then straightened. He didn't salute, but his stance looked like he was just an inch away from doing so. "I won't let you down."
|
|
|
Post by eez on Dec 27, 2009 2:49:06 GMT -5
"For both our sakes, I hope you don't."
Just as the Evil Emperor was about to dismiss the agent, another grub--this one stouter in stature and somewhat carrying an air of importance--came before them both and hopped onto a stool, inching the thing up to where Zurg could bend over slightly and overhear the insectoid's cupped whisperings to one of his horns.
"Is that so...." The Evil Emperor's stark, yellow pupils contracted sharply as he took his head away, his face rather expressionless.
"It seems there is a...change of plans." He addressed the agent, intertwining his fingers together in a thoughtful manner.
And what a change it was.
|
|
|
Post by Blacksteel on Dec 27, 2009 2:58:42 GMT -5
"What's going on?" Hellboy asked, arching a brow. Zurg's shift in tone of voice was more than enough to arouse his suspicions. Something must have happened. The demon just hoped that it was nothing serious.
|
|
|
Post by eez on Dec 27, 2009 3:02:55 GMT -5
"Why, nothing more than the consequences of our actions, my dear!" The Evil Emperor replied sweetly, almost motherly.
"I daresay that since you crashed the wedding--as ordered and performed remarkably--I do believe that the groom and the rest of the merry sort would like a piece of us for ruining their memorable day." Zurg simply made a face of disgust at the thought of happiness and simply discarded the notion away mentally as he continued. "And since I was the one who commanded you to do the deed, they no doubt would like to exact their revenge."
"Oh well." Zurg remarked casually with a brief shrug. "I'll just have to fortify defenses, load some traps, and keep you around a little longer than scheduled."
|
|
|
Post by Blacksteel on Dec 27, 2009 3:11:52 GMT -5
Consequences? Hellboy wondered. His heart almost felt like it skipped a beat. Did anyone get hurt? He hadn't wanted for anyone to get seriously wounded. If a building's crumbling onto you head you obviously make a run for it. That was kind of the whole point of bringing a burning building down.
"I daresay that since you crashed the wedding--as ordered and performed remarkably--I do believe that the groom and the rest of the merry sort would like a piece of us for ruining their memorable day. And since I was the one who commanded you to do the deed, they no doubt would like to exact their revenge."
Oh, so no one had gotten hurt. That was a relief. They just wanted to give them a piece of their minds. Hellboy smirked and leaned back against the refreshments table. "Well, they can try," he said, shrugging offhandedly. "They didn't seem all that efficient in hand-to-hand combat, and that's my specialty, unfortunately for them." He allowed himself a brief chuckle, then tilted his head to the side. "Would they really come here, though? This place is pretty much a fortress."
|
|
|
Post by eez on Dec 27, 2009 3:15:49 GMT -5
"Oh they're going to try alright, make no mistake." After perhaps a good two decades of fighting against the best of the best, Zurg knew full well what Lightyear was capable of once his mind was put to it--just look at their unhealthy, obsessive relationship!
And it was good to see that the agent was confident; that would prove to be an asset in the skirmish to eventually come.
"They will come, I am sure of it." The Evil Emperor answered simply. "Knowing Team Lightyear, they will try to enter through the back door that they think I don't know but I do know but they don't know that I know." He smiled, loving how that twister sounded.
|
|