Post by ex-ar luver345 on Oct 15, 2008 19:37:50 GMT -5
Soo, I thought since my first attempt at this was bad, I figured I'd rewrite it. Enjoy! Oh, and could someone maybe delete the original? Thanks.
Chapter 1- A Journey And Second Thoughts
As the young fox looked out the window of the ship, she sighed, already homesick. She was a healthy, thirteen-year-old vixen from Mobius, with silky fur colored a deep violet color on her main body. Her eyes were like sapphire pools of curiosity. She had three shamrock green tails, each one having a different colored tip. She was wearing a red dress, adorned with golden hearts here and there, and matching high heels.
She fidgeted nervously with her bangs and wiggled a bit in her seat. 'Do I really want to do this?' she asked herself in her mind, though she knew it was too late to turn back. 'I mean, I know they're doing this because it's what they think is best, but I can't help but worry about them. How will they fare without me?'
"This is Star Command Escort Ship number 3627 reporting in." "Do you have the new recruit with you?" "Yes, sir." "Good. You're clear."
The young vixen carefully checked to see if she had everything before taking a deep breath. "Okay, Telaria. Here you go. No turning back now," she said to herself, before stepping out of the ship to face her new life. She looked around and gasped. The place was huge!
"You must be the new recruit,"a gruff voice stated, causing Telaria to spin around to face its owner, pocket knife in hand. She blushed in embarrassment and put the pocket knife away when she realized who it was. It was a man, looking to be in his sixties at least, about her height, wearing a Space Ranger uniform. A white mustache indicated that Telaria's guess at his age wasn't too far off. Telaria already knew who he was from reading news articles. He was known as Commander Nebula, head of Star Command.
"Woah, calm down, I'm not gonna hurt ya,"Commander Nebula said with a slight chuckle. "Well, ya obviously know how to defend yourself, at least." "Yes, sir," Telaria replied, blushing. "My dad gave this pocket knife to me when I was ten,"she continued, pulling her pocket knife back out,"It's a family heirloom, passed down from generation to generation for about three hundred years." "Well, ain't that somethin? What's your name, by the way?"Commander Nebula asked
"Telaria Prower," Telaria responded. "Nice name, kid. Welcome to Star Command!" Commander Nebula said. Just then, a cylindrical robot with treads, a glass dome, and a floating yellow head came rushing into the room. He had the Space Ranger logo on his chest. "Hey, Pop, I-" he started, but cut himself off when he saw Telaria. "Not now, XR! Can't ya see I'm talking with the new recruit?!" Commander Nebula scolded. "Is that your name? XR?"Telaria asked, already attached to the little robot standing before her. She had always felt comfortable around robots as long as they had some personality.
"Yeah, that's my name. What's it to ya?" XR snapped. Telaria giggled at the robot's spunky attitude. "I like that name. It's simple and has a nice ring to it, in my opinion," Telaria commented. XR stared, surprised, before smiling. "Thanks, I guess," he said. Telaria knew then that as long as XR was there, she was going to be just fine.
Well? What do you think? If I get enough positive comments, I might continue.
Chapter 1- A Journey And Second Thoughts
As the young fox looked out the window of the ship, she sighed, already homesick. She was a healthy, thirteen-year-old vixen from Mobius, with silky fur colored a deep violet color on her main body. Her eyes were like sapphire pools of curiosity. She had three shamrock green tails, each one having a different colored tip. She was wearing a red dress, adorned with golden hearts here and there, and matching high heels.
She fidgeted nervously with her bangs and wiggled a bit in her seat. 'Do I really want to do this?' she asked herself in her mind, though she knew it was too late to turn back. 'I mean, I know they're doing this because it's what they think is best, but I can't help but worry about them. How will they fare without me?'
"This is Star Command Escort Ship number 3627 reporting in." "Do you have the new recruit with you?" "Yes, sir." "Good. You're clear."
The young vixen carefully checked to see if she had everything before taking a deep breath. "Okay, Telaria. Here you go. No turning back now," she said to herself, before stepping out of the ship to face her new life. She looked around and gasped. The place was huge!
"You must be the new recruit,"a gruff voice stated, causing Telaria to spin around to face its owner, pocket knife in hand. She blushed in embarrassment and put the pocket knife away when she realized who it was. It was a man, looking to be in his sixties at least, about her height, wearing a Space Ranger uniform. A white mustache indicated that Telaria's guess at his age wasn't too far off. Telaria already knew who he was from reading news articles. He was known as Commander Nebula, head of Star Command.
"Woah, calm down, I'm not gonna hurt ya,"Commander Nebula said with a slight chuckle. "Well, ya obviously know how to defend yourself, at least." "Yes, sir," Telaria replied, blushing. "My dad gave this pocket knife to me when I was ten,"she continued, pulling her pocket knife back out,"It's a family heirloom, passed down from generation to generation for about three hundred years." "Well, ain't that somethin? What's your name, by the way?"Commander Nebula asked
"Telaria Prower," Telaria responded. "Nice name, kid. Welcome to Star Command!" Commander Nebula said. Just then, a cylindrical robot with treads, a glass dome, and a floating yellow head came rushing into the room. He had the Space Ranger logo on his chest. "Hey, Pop, I-" he started, but cut himself off when he saw Telaria. "Not now, XR! Can't ya see I'm talking with the new recruit?!" Commander Nebula scolded. "Is that your name? XR?"Telaria asked, already attached to the little robot standing before her. She had always felt comfortable around robots as long as they had some personality.
"Yeah, that's my name. What's it to ya?" XR snapped. Telaria giggled at the robot's spunky attitude. "I like that name. It's simple and has a nice ring to it, in my opinion," Telaria commented. XR stared, surprised, before smiling. "Thanks, I guess," he said. Telaria knew then that as long as XR was there, she was going to be just fine.
Well? What do you think? If I get enough positive comments, I might continue.