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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 18:14:12 GMT -5
"True," he murmured. "But since you've already created an alias for yourself you could obviously build up on that. Heck, you sound like a smart guy. Who wouldn't hire you."
The demon nodded. "Yep... humans are like that. And I guess their mannerisms are the same all around? So yeah, I know about humans. Anything else?"
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Post by eez on Oct 31, 2009 18:17:45 GMT -5
"A name, sure, but DNA is DNA." He argued. "Most hiring tests use DNA in their rounds since people typically use hologuises or splicing operations to bypass the law."
"And you already know about humans, huh? Well, I guess who doesn't." Smoltz shrugged. "Then I guess you already know that humans are common candidates for Space Rangers; which, might I remind you, are very troublesome as well as annoying to work around."
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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 18:27:47 GMT -5
"DNA? Oh, wait, nevermind," he said, but then he recalled how Zurg had asked him to sign their contract. That blood sample must have been for the sake of taking his DNA... sample... oh boy. That didn't bode very well in his particular case. He hoped Zurg didn't try anything funny with his blood. It had a... strange effect on the unprepared.
"Space Rangers, yeah. The so-called defence of the galaxy or whatever," he snorted, finishing off the last of his bread and jam combo. "So like... what about you? Are you a pretty well-known race?"
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Post by eez on Oct 31, 2009 18:30:18 GMT -5
"Not...well-known, but known enough. The head of the Galactic Alliance is of the same race I am." Smoltz explained, taking a slice of bread as well. "We're not very common. Most of us tend to say on our planet and run government affairs and such. We make for great lawyers and political advisers, but other than that, we don't venture out much. Most species don't venture out much when you think about it."
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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 18:31:51 GMT -5
"Yeah, but judging by this line of work I'll be coming across a heck of a lot of, well, aliens. Isn't there some sort of guideline I could download to learn more?"
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Post by eez on Oct 31, 2009 18:33:57 GMT -5
"Well, you could always try the data center down in Capital Plaza but since you work for Zurg....it won't be as likely as you just strolling in like everyone else." He chuckled. "That's why the Evil Emperor sent you here, I guess. You know, he's a smart cookie despite how he acts. It's like a facade or something, but anyway, want a list of races?"
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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 18:36:49 GMT -5
"Sure, I could use one," Hellboy replied. Seemed that Zurg had a card up his sleeve for every occasion.
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Post by eez on Oct 31, 2009 18:39:44 GMT -5
"Alright, let me transfer..." Smoltz took out a PDA of his own fashion and immediately connected with the agent's. "It's good to know that Zurg updated his firmware...." He muttered, customizing a secure connection with a ding!
"There! Now for you to accept." He said, sending a file.
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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 19:02:42 GMT -5
Hellboy pressed accept and downloaded the file. Upon opening it, he was glad to see that thanks to the automatic translator he'd added beforehand, everything was at least understandable. He'd have to presuse it later on at his leisure though.
"Okay, then. Now to the most important matter. Weaponry and space-flight."
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Post by eez on Oct 31, 2009 19:04:29 GMT -5
"Weaponry and space-flight...." Smoltz repeated in-between sips. "Well, what do you know already."
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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 19:05:13 GMT -5
"Um, well..." Hellboy scratched at his horn stump sheepishly. "Nothing whatsoever..."
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Post by eez on Oct 31, 2009 19:06:59 GMT -5
"I was afraid of that...." Smoltz set his cup down and proceeded to go about this in a rational, calm manner.
"Do you know any physics? Astrophysics? Laws of gravity?" He listed, tapping a finger as he said each subject.
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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 19:08:13 GMT -5
"Like, what goes up must come down...?" he asked feebly. Noting the look on Smoltz's face, however, brought him up short. "Well no... I was always more a man of action than science..."
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Post by eez on Oct 31, 2009 19:11:50 GMT -5
"Yet again, Zurg typically hires action men--like yourself--over men of science, as you call it." He sighed, rolling his eyes at his current bout of luck.
"Look, since physics--let alone astrophysics--is a subject that takes YEARS of studious work, I'm going to run you through some easy tidbits." Smoltz instructed, making a few gestures. "One, there are no directions in space, so there is no up or down or even left and right. It's all space; directions, irrelevant. Second, you can't breath it in--of course--so you must always go out with a 0G suit if you want to do some exploring. Third, there are no explosions in space since there is no air for fire to feed upon. Fourth, let your onboard nav-computer guide your ship around the galaxy. It's bad enough if you land in a star....And fifth, your shields are your best friends. Take care of them and they take care of you. Got that? That's basically what an agent should know."
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Post by Blacksteel on Oct 31, 2009 19:14:57 GMT -5
"That sounds simple enough." Of course, he kind of already knew that there was no air in space, but it wasn't as if Smoltz's advice went unheeded. "But won't I still have to drive the ship, even with the nav-computer?"
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